In 2008, my tinnitus turned on. My ears started ringing, and they have never stopped. Doctors offered no solace besides, "You get used to it." Early in 2010, I read about Willie Morris, a former sheriff who, unable to cope with tinnitus, shot himself. In his suicide note, he wrote, “I hope that my death will help bring about some cure... It is important that my life will not be wasted.” In the absence of a medical cure, I vowed to find a creative solution.

All sounds produced live without overdubs on the Lady's Harp, a feedback instrument/installation built from 27 foot long piano wires, pressure transducers, and coil pickups made from air valve solenoids. The strings are never plucked during this recording, but "bowed" by feedback to create sustained tones. Lady's Harp was built on site at Elsewhere Collaborative during a residency in Summer 2011. I'm aware that on some level, the long sustained tones of the Lady's Harp could seem like an attempt to translate or dramatize my tinnitus. Please understand: I am not interested in representation. My intention is to create an aesthetic space where tinnitus can exist alongside music as an essential companion, rather than having to be ignored for accurate listening.

I want to make music that makes tinnitus desirable rather than hated or feared. I do not want to get used to my hearing damage—I want to use it.

Composing the Tinnitus Suites is an ongoing piece. This is its first iteration, and it spans the first 4 not so silent years of my illness.

daniel fishkin
http://dfiction.com/